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Quiet and Peace

  • Quiet and Peace

Summer of 2008 I began second shooting for my good friend Jessie Smith.  My very first wedding was just supposed to be a favor, I was just helping her out. I loved photography and had been attracted to it since high school.  However, from that very first wedding, the thoughts started rolling.  Since June 2008 I began contemplating, discerning, worrying, dreaming and worrying some more.  I had been praying that the Lord would show me where my focus should be.  I was pulled toward art, I LOVED design and I had just gotten into photography. I have journal entries where I openly told the Lord that I felt lost, no direction.

I loved video editing, interior decorating, painting dishes….but still, no direction.  Was I just supposed to have a million hobbies and a career that I was just OK with?  Why did I feel like nothing really fit me but yet I was being pulled in so many directions at the same time? Very confusing. And being the worrier that I am, guess what I did to try to fit it…  I WORRIED.  It’s really a bad habit, especially for a girl who claims to know and trust the Lord.  Shouldn’t I be able to trust that He had greater things in store for me?  Isn’t He big enough for that?  The answer is YES, He is and He has shown me again and again how faithful He is.

That being said, Inspired Designs is not just a good idea that went well, or a pretty sweet dream, it’s an answered prayer. It’s the direction I had been praying for since the very beginning of college.  Now, a year and a 1/2 into the business, you would think that I would have stopped the worrying, right? I have a direction, I have a plan and I have new dreams. However, I still worry.  Building a business is all about constant innovation and continual growth.  You have to dream big and this means that your mind never stops running! Never. I fall asleep thinking about blog posts and wake up wanting to find new bridal portrait locations.  It’s bad.  The urge to try new things and expand is overwhelming some days. I feel like I’m being held back by school and that I’m constantly falling behind. Is this true? I have no idea, but I have decided to stop worrying, stop analyzing and stop wasting my time thinking about everything that is out of my control. It’s a shame that it has taken me this long to get to this point and to be honest, I know I will still fall into those habits again. But! I am announcing to all of you blog lovers that I am making a decision to stop the worrying! No more.

This next month or so is my Inspired Designs Vacation.  I have no huge plans (except WPPI! Vegas here we come!).  It’s great to actually have NO commitments on a Saturday and to stay home and watch movies with my fiance’ while it SNOWS again! It has been an amazing Saturday and I’m looking forward to having a few more like it.  This next month or so I am trying not to underestimate the value of quietness and peace.  There it is! I said it! Now you all can hold me to it.

Enjoy the rest of your weekend and stop to appreciate the little things!

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